{"id":3279,"date":"2021-10-05T16:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-10-05T16:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/?p=3279"},"modified":"2021-10-05T19:44:05","modified_gmt":"2021-10-05T19:44:05","slug":"sexual-trauma-isnt-the-end-of-intimate-relationships-for-you-how-to-begin-healing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/en\/sexual-trauma-isnt-the-end-of-intimate-relationships-for-you-how-to-begin-healing\/","title":{"rendered":"Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Posted by&nbsp; Soribel Mart\u00ednez, LCSW<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image is-style-default\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma-300x217.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma-16x12.jpg 16w\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3280 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"361\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3280\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma-300x217.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Sexual-Trauma-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No one should ever have to experience sexual trauma.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Going through it, at any scale, can change your life forever. It can negatively impact your mental health, decrease your trust in people, and make it difficult to be in intimate relationships.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Even if you have a partner who is more than understanding and supportive, it\u2019s not uncommon for survivors of sexual trauma to feel a combination of fear and guilt when they aren\u2019t ready to be intimate with someone they love.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If that\u2019s how you feel, you\u2019re not alone.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, you also don\u2019t need to feel that way forever. Healing is possible. It starts with taking that first step. Let\u2019s talk more about how you can do that.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Be in a Healthy Relationship<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There is no rush to get into a relationship after experiencing abuse. But, if you\u2019re considering taking part in sexual activity, being in a healthy relationship is important for your healing.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image is-style-default\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship-16x12.jpg 16w\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3281 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"333\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3281\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/Healthy-Relationship-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A healthy relationship needs to be based on love, compassion, and care. It needs to be a place that you, as a survivor, feel completely safe.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you feel securely attached to your partner, you\u2019re more likely to trust that no matter what happens between you, everything will be okay. It\u2019s a simple thing, but a very big deal for survivors.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you\u2019re in a relationship, open communication is crucial. Ask for what you need. Tell your partner what\u2019s necessary for you to feel safe. Some of those needs might include:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li>Scheduling sexual activities so you know when to expect them<\/li><li>Sharing intimate moments with the lights on<\/li><li>Going at your pace or taking the lead<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s also important that your partner knows any \u201ctriggers\u201d you might have. For example, you might not be comfortable with them kissing a certain part of your body, or wrapping their arms around you from behind.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s not always easy to talk about what you\u2019ve been through. But, the more open you are about your needs with your partner, the stronger your intimacy will become. Plus, having that support system is imperative for the healing process.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Build Up Your Self-Esteem<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image is-style-default\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem.jpg 331w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem-199x300.jpg 199w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem-8x12.jpg 8w\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3282 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 331px) 100vw, 331px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"331\" height=\"500\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3282\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem.jpg 331w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem-199x300.jpg 199w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/self-esteem-8x12.jpg 8w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 331px) 100vw, 331px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s not uncommon for survivors of sexual trauma to experience shame and guilt. Even though the traumatic experience wasn\u2019t your fault, it\u2019s easy to place blame on yourself and hide away in embarrassment and shame.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">One of the best things you can do to heal is to treat yourself with compassion and kindness.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If someone you love approached you and told you they were sexually assaulted, how would you respond? You certainly wouldn\u2019t tell them they should be ashamed of themselves. You would support them in any way you could.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It\u2019s important to do the same for yourself.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Self-care can feel like a buzzword these days, but it\u2019s a key component in treating yourself properly so you can start healing.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Expect Roadblocks<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Healing from sexual trauma isn\u2019t easy.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, it can be more manageable when your expectations are realistic.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image is-style-default\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life-16x12.jpg 16w\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3283 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"332\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3283\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/RoadBlocks-in-Life-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There will be roadblocks. Some days will be better than others. Certain things might trigger you until you\u2019re able to move past them. It\u2019s important to understand those roadblocks aren\u2019t your fault, either. The fact that you\u2019re trying to heal and move forward is huge, and not something everyone does as quickly as they should.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Remember, though, that you don\u2019t have to go through the healing process alone.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you experience roadblocks, getting through them is easier when you have a support system. That could include family members, friends, your partner, a support group, or a therapist.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Working with a mental health professional can give you the tools necessary to manage your fears and triggers every day. It can also help you move forward in your relationship, or be ready to accept intimacy in future relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you\u2019re a sexual trauma survivor, feel free to contact me. Healing is within your reach, and taking that first step is often the hardest part.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing Posted by&nbsp; Soribel Mart\u00ednez, LCSW No one should ever have to experience sexual trauma.&nbsp; Going through it, at any scale, can change your life forever. It [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3187,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"default","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"default","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[32,116,120,122,118,28],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3279","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-couples-therapy","category-individual-therapy","category-online-therapy","category-sex-therapy","category-therapy-for-women","category-trauma-therapy"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing - SMPsychotherapy and Counseling Services - Danbury &amp; Hartford, CT &amp; New York, NY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/en\/sexual-trauma-isnt-the-end-of-intimate-relationships-for-you-how-to-begin-healing\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing - SMPsychotherapy and Counseling Services - Danbury &amp; Hartford, CT &amp; New York, NY\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Sexual Trauma Isn\u2019t the End of Intimate Relationships for You: How to Begin Healing Posted by&nbsp; Soribel Mart\u00ednez, LCSW No one should ever have to experience sexual trauma.&nbsp; Going through it, at any scale, can change your life forever. 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