{"id":3700,"date":"2022-02-01T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2022-02-01T10:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/?p=3700"},"modified":"2022-02-01T04:45:43","modified_gmt":"2022-02-01T04:45:43","slug":"what-to-do-when-your-family-doesnt-respect-your-decision-to-not-have-children","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/en\/what-to-do-when-your-family-doesnt-respect-your-decision-to-not-have-children\/","title":{"rendered":"What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Posted by&nbsp; <\/em><a href=\"mailto:soribel@psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\"><em>Soribel Martinez<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185-16x12.jpg 16w\" fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3701 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3701\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_478418185-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Having children is an incredibly personal choice. While some people might want children and struggle with infertility issues, others actively choose not to have them, and that\u2019s completely okay.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Unfortunately, not everyone is always on board with that choice. When it\u2019s your own family that doesn\u2019t respect your decision not to have children, things can be difficult.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">At the end of the day, it\u2019s important to remember that whether you have kids is up to you. No one else should influence your decision or \u201cguilt\u201d you into something.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But, even if you feel confident in that decision, what can you do when your family doesn\u2019t see things the same way?&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Be Clear About Your Reasons<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Often, family members might disapprove of your choice not to have kids because they don\u2019t fully understand why. It\u2019s easy for some people to think not having children is selfish. That isn\u2019t true, and it\u2019s important that they know that.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712-16x12.jpg 16w\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3702 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3702\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1282524712-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">So, don\u2019t be afraid to talk about your reasons. Maybe you want to focus on your career and it would be selfish to spend so much time away from a child. Maybe you want to focus on being a wonderful aunt or uncle instead.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You might even choose not to have children for environmental reasons. Explaining things like that to your loved ones can make it easier for them to understand and cope.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">However, it\u2019s okay to not have a list of \u201cexcuses\u201d. Even if you don\u2019t have a specific reason, it\u2019s okay to simply say, \u201cI\u2019ve just never wanted to have kids.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Create Healthy Boundaries<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Once you\u2019ve explained to your family that you\u2019re not having children and given your reasons, that should be the end of the conversation. If it\u2019s not, don\u2019t be afraid to set some healthy boundaries that will keep your mental well-being protected.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296-300x169.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296-16x9.jpg 16w\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3703 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"282\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3703\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296-300x169.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_1463151296-16x9.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If a family member continues to bring up your decision, be clear and direct with them that you\u2019re not going to discuss it further. You can bring up the fact that you\u2019ve talked about it before and nothing has changed.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The important thing about boundaries is that they need to be firm. You don\u2019t have to be rude or angry, but asking your family for their respect is something that needs to be clear. You also need to show that there will be consequences if they don\u2019t respect those boundaries. That might mean not showing up to every family function, or even not talking to certain members who can\u2019t give you the respect you deserve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">It\u2019s Okay for Them to Grieve<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you want your family to respect your decision, you have to respect their feelings.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Maybe your parents are disappointed that they\u2019ll never have grandchildren. Or, maybe you have a sibling who has always wanted a niece or nephew.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You\u2019re not having kids because of personal feelings. That doesn\u2019t mean you should deny your family their feelings about the subject. They need to discuss it with you in understanding, respectful ways. But, it\u2019s important to understand that they might grieve that decision.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large\"><img data-srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615-16x12.jpg 16w\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\"   data-src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615.jpg\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3704 lazyload\"  sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"500\" height=\"334\" src=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3704\" srcset=\"https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615.jpg 500w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/shutterstock_231589615-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That\u2019s okay.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Try to be comforting in the way you approach your discussion. Listen to their feelings and even their concerns. The way they feel doesn\u2019t have to change your decision, but they\u2019re still allowed to be sad or upset about things. Again, this is where boundaries can play a big role. You can be there for them in their grief without letting them cross over a line of criticism.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Your family should be a built-in support system when it comes to major life decisions like having kids or not. If they choose not to respect your decision, it\u2019s up to you to hold to your boundaries. Communication is necessary for situations like these, but don\u2019t sacrifice your well-being to appease certain family members who won\u2019t accept your choice.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children Posted by&nbsp; Soribel Martinez Having children is an incredibly personal choice. While some people might want children and struggle with infertility issues, others actively choose not [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3701,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[124,33,32,116,118,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3700","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-anxiety","category-anxiety-therapy","category-couples-therapy","category-individual-therapy","category-therapy-for-women","category-uncategorized"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children - SMPsychotherapy and Counseling Services - Danbury &amp; Hartford, CT &amp; New York, NY<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/psychotherapyandcounselingservices.com\/en\/what-to-do-when-your-family-doesnt-respect-your-decision-to-not-have-children\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children - SMPsychotherapy and Counseling Services - Danbury &amp; Hartford, CT &amp; New York, NY\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"What to Do When Your Family Doesn\u2019t Respect Your Decision to Not Have Children Posted by&nbsp; Soribel Martinez Having children is an incredibly personal choice. 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